It’s in the newspapers. It’s on TV. You’ll hear it on the radio.
It’s even right under your nose, in your mail. And especially in your email at this time of year. What do you do with all the unsolicited advice about what to give as presents to your family, all the aunts and uncles and assorted offspring, and even your cubicle-sharing officemate at work?
If any of them are pet owners, it’s a cinch. You can spot a pet owner easily: the one who appears to be gazing intently at his or her navel while chatting with you, then suddenly plucking here and there at his or her clothes, and quickly waving all ten fingers in the air.
It’s known around these parts as the Pet-hair Flick, and it’s really catching on.
What should be Numero Uno on your list for these fastidious folks? The real honest-to-goodness Scotch Lint Roller. Yes, 3M is especially glad they’ve got this one on the product list, since Americans adore their pets sleeping, eating and breathing indoors with them 24/7.
What’s that? You thought it was only for removing lint? C’mon, get with it! If they named it for pet hair, they’d have to squeeze Cat-Dog-Rabbit-Ferret-Mouse-Gerbil-Hamster-Horse-hair Roller on the label.
And the best thing about this gift? It gets used. Even after a loved one’s pet has departed for the great Blue Yonder, (aka the pet cemetery under the pricker bushes behind the garage) the pet hair keeps coming out. Yes, it does: out of the sofa cushions, off of the bed linens, from under the air conditioner vent and the heat ducts.
That fur will be in the dust bunnies under the bed for eons after Spot or FooFoo has departed.
So buy a few rolls for the in-laws, and don’t forget Debbie Sue in accounting.
It’s one gift that’s sure to be used frequently, and your children may even ask Santa to bring them lint rollers of their own next year.
That’s if they can get the Cat-Dog-Rabbit-Ferret-Mouse-Gerbil-Hamster-Horse-hair off their waffles first.